Off​-​White Noise

by Dustin and the Explosions

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1.
I've followed you home more than a few times Spend hours alone just thinking of you I find myself going out of my way So that we can cross paths and I can fake a chance meeting with you You borrowed my coat when it was cold out And I smelled it for days 'cause it still had your scent I've followed you home more than a few times What else could that have meant? For summer's sake then you can take my pride And tie it down and lock it up til spring She could have spit in my face, I almost wish she'd done it because I would have taken anything And, God, I wanted it all I fit the archetypal dead end Good shepherd leave me, I'm a sad lost lamb Could a strong man keep his locks? And could a Philistine woman learn to love the God of Abraham? Inside I used to be a city And I built Jerusalem with hammer and nails I've followed you home more than a few times But when it rains it hails For summer's sake then you can take my pride And tie it down and lock it up til spring She could have spit in my face, I almost wish she'd done it because I would have taken anything And, God, I wanted it all And you can take my pride And you can take my pride And you can take my pride And tie it down and lock it up til spring She could have spit in my face, I almost wish she'd done it because I would have taken anything And, God, I wanted you for Two years and I still feel the same way Breathe down your neck and you don't even flinch You froze my heart in early winter And now it won't move an inch
2.
Thunderpunk 04:29
I wish I could be way more angry I'm trying to make it hurt more lately Like how it hurt when she forgot me An avalanche upon my body Am I forever trapped in motion? Devoid of any firm emotion? I even miss the no good feelings 'Cause I don't feel a thing at all in all my dealings Don't love me, I don't need assistance To justify my own existence I no longer require attention So that one day, when I die, it might be worth a mention And I don't have room to love another I hardly even know my brother And I've been on my own for so long I hardly even notice when I hear a love song Hold on, hold on my brother It's getting good right as we speak But don't ask me what I really think 'Cause I wouldn't tell you anything With all that they have gotten me in, I try not to have strong opinions I'm not even a legal voter 'Cause I don't want the world to weigh upon my shoulders And, too, how could I understand us? I still haven't read Albert Camus I haven't even looked at Nietzsche And I haven't been to church in months so God won't teach me Good news for you my brother It gets good even as we speak But don't ask me what I really think 'Cause I wouldn't tell you anything I used to have a lot more passion And people used to like me back then I wasn't always such a cynic And I didn't hate this town or all the people in it But it's a lie my brother You're young and you don't know what it's like When her heel finds where your ribs separate And it cuts you like a spike And whether or not you come to terms with it, We are all so very fowl I didn't want to have to tell you all of this But it's better you know now We don't feel feelings, they're just What we've evolved to make us breed Our happiness comes second to the species So we can spread our seed Sooner or later you'll discover You only love a version of her And though you swear she loves you, I'll bet That you haven't so much as even crossed her mind yet The world you think you know's just bitter Get ready for a lifelong winter And though you tell me that I can't know what this means, I don't love anyone and don't feel anything
3.
It was raining from the ceiling when the walls all came to flood So I pulled out from the corner and I woke up tasting blood And I touched my bottom lip and tried to realign my vision Both my ears were red and ringing, but I tried my best to listen And the man in blue there said I only had myself to blame The woman offered me a cigarette but I can't recall her name And the shock, it was remarkable, but I tried hard not to smile If only for the sake of my victim, though I felt just like a child And I couldn't tell you where this new found sense of purpose came When only hours before this, I'd considered jumping from a train And then Sunday morning rolled around and the chimes and bells were ringing All those birds, they'd had their burdens lifted, and all of them were singing And I told my mother that I wouldn't be in church that day For I was ill, but I'd return when I was feeling more okay And I was sure the congregation could appreciate my leave I would be back in better spirits, I'd be ready to believe And the elders, save for three of them, they'd all forgot my name I'd returned a few times since that day but I've never been the same I no longer hate the sunshine and I love the smell of air And the sound of my own breath's no longer something I can't bear Well my debt had piled high and all my work saw no reprieve I was diligent in all my studies when I resolved to leave I was holed up, I was broken, I had fallen off the track And though I talk about it often, I have never once looked back And tomorrow I will wake up and not feel lonely or deprived I'll have drank myself nearly to death, but I'll be so much more alive And my clock will be circadian 'cause I'll have oiled all it's gears, I will sleep the whole night through the way I haven't done in years I was whole and miserable, well behaved and terribly well spoken But me, I'd prefer to be nearly dead and hardly anywhere and broken
4.
You left three weeks ago, you've called me quite routinely up 'til now That might be fine if it weren't every other day Or half as often if you're busy, oh, we both know you'd be mad If it were you that stayed at home and if it were me away A few more days of this and we won't know each other at all But something tells me you won't mind I might think twice about these words if you weren't so consistent Six months ago, I never thought I'd be afraid to see a love of this kind It gets so lonely here but I'm still sweating you out every pore You're not my only friend, I've got, at least, a dozen more But I'll save my problems for the girl Who from three thousand miles east of here can keep me just as lonely as before When you left home you told me I would always be on your mind And that you'd take care to do the same Well mission accomplished, you're inside my head, but, still, I wonder If you don't come across my name It's almost ironic that you'd wonder if I'd ever think of you When you don't ever think of me Give me attention, give me closure, give me anything at all I just want your gaze at me for a single day and you can say that I'm at your feet It gets so lonely here but I'm still sweating you out every pore You're not my only friend, I've got, at least, a dozen more But I'll save my problems for the girl Who from three thousand miles east of here can keep me just as lonely as before
5.
I will steal the flesh from every single one of you to reconstruct my Frankenstein Heart. I will love only one, she's dead too. I will love only one, you could do.
6.
There must be a better way to go about the things I go about My life sucks now and I can't imagine what comes next My best friend hates me and all the girls I spend my time with Like to think that I'm their boyfriend without the title or the sex And I like to tell myself it's 'cause I'm such a nice guy But everyone can probably see my disdain And I don't enjoy the time I spend I hardly even consider these people my friends And all the life I'm wasting surely isn't worth the gain I still want to play someday but everybody thinks my demo's lame I really want to go to Monday's show, but I've got work And I like handstamps and zines and most everything about this music scene But all the guys in all my favorite bands are jerks My friend, Des, knows these guys who opened up a space in East Van Nuys Maybe if the liked me, they would let me play a show 'Cause I kind of like the sound of getting this old band up off the ground It's never what you can do, it's always who you know And with all the useless people I know, you'd think by now That I'd have found some reason to make it worthwhile to keep coming to this town
7.
I can change the person I've been Open me up and rearrange the circuits Cut me down the middle and peel back my skin My wires aren't buried far beneath the surface I don't feel young and I don't feel clever And I'm ten degrees colder than I was this time last year Pull me apart and put me back together I can change everything and I can get better, I can learn all the answers and I can be whatever Touch your fingers to mine, 'cause I've tried Sink your hands in and feel me from the inside I need some better goals Cuz I'm so tired of trying to feel whole I don't need to be unique anymore You'd know better than most that I'm sure I've been trying to feel real for what feels like forever I don't want to be whole I just want to feel better I know your type I've been awake for the last three days and I Think I'm finally tired enough to not care If you already know what I'm gonna say about You and the way you can breathe like its easy, You're sure of yourself and you're hardly afraid that you'll die You're so nice and it's driving me crazy I feel it ache at the base of my soul If you come any closer I'll devour you whole Touch your lips to my skin, 'cause I've tried Sink in your teeth and feel me from the inside I need to find control 'Cause I'm so tired of trying to feel whole I don't need to be unique anymore You'd know better than most that I'm sure I've been trying to feel real for what feels like forever I don't want to be whole I just want to feel better Lets cut our fingers, plant a tree of us outside We'll make them bleed and drown the seed in constant water and light Touch your fingers to mine, 'cause I've tried Sink your hands in and feel me from the inside I need better goals 'Cause I'm so tired of trying to get whole I don't need to be unique anymore You'd know better than mast that I'm sure I've been trying to feel real for what feels like forever I don't want to be whole I just want to feel better
8.
Some might call it apathy, Inexperience, innocence, or fate And all your sympathy Is probably 'cause it's easy to relate And it's kind of new to me, This kind of love that I now kind of hate. Don't think it wrong of me 'Cause I don't think I can just sit here and wait She's like an island in the distant sun, I can hardly at all see it from here Watched it since the day'd begun But I'm too afraid to go too near And the earth defaults it's rotation Despite my pleas, no matter how sincere I'll be here 'til the day gets done, Maybe by then I can see her Lost in paradise And I've got the nerve to bring you home From a place that I can't find A place that I thought I used to know I fell behind Now that I know that I can go And I hope my days don't mind I'll be spending them here all alone I'm sick to my stomach now, Body's aching and I can hardly breathe Want to swim but don't know how, And it's only just an ocean out of reach Killing me's what you'd prefer and I'd tell you to do your worst and I just wanted to rescue her, but I need her to rescue me first Only slightly out of reach The sun rises for her and sets on me While you're lost in paradise And I've got the nerve to bring you home From a place that I can't find A place that I thought I used to know I fell behind Now that I know that I can go And I hope my days don't mind I'll be spending them here all alone Only slightly out of reach The sun rises for her and sets on me While you're lost in paradise And I've got the nerve to bring you home From a place that I can't find A place that I thought I used to know I fell behind Now that I know that I can go And I hope my days don't mind I'll be spending them here all alone
9.
Paranoia slowly setting in Creepy spiders piercing through my skin Shame and guilt are holding tightly Hardened automaton sobbing silently Leave this place There's nothing left for you to break Ugly thoughts are leaking from my brain Caterpillars writhing through your veins Dirty creature, you were someone's son With our eyes closed, we are anyone Leave this place There's nothing left for you to break Burn the house down, torch the memories Blackened photographs, I remember these Friends and family are haunting me For decisions we've made recently Leave this place There's nothing left for you Leave this place There's nothing left for you to break
10.
Colors 03:15
What hand has greased these pistons? It's like I've purchased them anew The blood cells that move inside my veins Just weeks ago were oh so few When did the world turn colors? Last time I checked, my ghost was black I thought my fingers calloused over, Thought my lips were chapped And, oh, my friend, I'm whole again How could this tone convince me To cut my nails and comb my hair And shed my winter coat for good? God knows before, I didn't care And how could one motion of your hand Just wipe away two years of grief? I spent so long sounding it down And you made it nothing just as brief And how could you Have made me new? No don't put money on a word I say, 'cause I will prove us wrong I thought these tones didn't exist, I hadn't felt them in so long And what godly forces brought me here? What took the earth and shook the ground? And when did the world turn colors? It wasn't like all of this before you were around
11.
I should have seen this coming quite some time ago You were always so far away, how could I not have known? I think I did but I still didn't say a word For fear that I might push you away, for worry I'd make things worse Come close I only want to hold your hand I miss your fingers in between mine And if I remember, you taste just like the ocean And I forgot about the tide What happens after all of this when you look at God, do you see yourself? You think that this is it, but I'm holding out for something else You weren't the first to question everything you learned Oh, but you were the first to make me question everything in turn And it made me scared but it was something that I couldn't just ignore Why could nothing in life, until this point, have shaken my body to its core? Sometimes I wonder if the media control my thoughts; My dreams are filled with b-list stars and old TV shows And if that's the case, then have I ever had an original idea? Or were all my thoughts on love and God programmed by 90210? And when did these notions all spring forth? All after one crooked angel fell? You think that that was it, but I'm holding out for something else And if this is all for you and I, will you touch my cheek and wish me well? You think that this is it, but I'm holding out for something else

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released July 5, 2013

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Dustin and the Explosions Los Angeles, California

Dustin and the Explosions is Evan, Cindy, and Mike. We like to play fast paced rock and roll songs. Slow songs are okay sometimes, too.

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